A while ago a “friend” of mine downloaded Snood onto my laptop. “Come on Alice, just try it once,” she coaxed. And I did. I played once. And then again. And again and again and again. I couldn’t stop. For the next two months I thought in Snood. When I closed my eyes, I saw Snoods. Then I hit rock bottom. I was playing for hours at a time, whenever I had a “free” moment. My roommate staged an intervention. That’s when I started attending SAA (Snood Addicts Anonymous) and keeping my Snood recovery journal.

I hope my story, in a Lifetime movie sort of way, will help others and give them the courage to PUT THE SNOOD DOWN!

Day One of Recovery (diary excerpt):

One more game. One more game. One more game. One more game. It’s my mantra.

For three months this beast has plagued me. I gorged myself on the free games. Levels evil, hard, journey – all gone. There’s only easy now and that is oh so unfulfilling. Yet as the counter viciously reminds me after each round, I have played over two thousand games of Snood. 1764 of which have been on the easy level.

I have deprived myself of sleep, been late to class, not done homework, and ignored drunken revelry all to feed this monkey. I am such a loser.

But the thing is, there are losers like me everywhere. I would find girls at my boarding school locked in the computer closet at four in the morning firing away. I have talked about Snood with multiple and varied types of people who nod their heads and whisper, “I know, I know.”

I don’t understand this need. I shoot heads at other groups of heads. If I’m on the mark, they disappear and I get some points. If I miss, the heads don’t move. In the face of achieving world peace, mastering quantum physics, and saving the whales, Snood is a huge challenge. And yet-

One more game. One more game. One more game. One more game.

It’s my mantra.

Hi, my name is Alice and I’m an addict. I don’t want pity. I don’t even want a movie deal. I want to stop this madness.

Why do you care? You care because either, like me you are a Snood addict, or you will become one.

There are two types of people in the world: those who dream in Snood and those who have never played. It’s optical crack – you can’t just play on the weekends or at parties.

It’s Snood! A video game. And not even a cool, detail- and plot-enriched video game like Final Fantasy. It’s point and click. Furthermore, Snood is void of the three “B’s” of video entertainment: Blood, Boobs, and Badasses.

What is the appeal? Snood’s creator teaches geology at Guilford. Are we harboring a madman intent on world domination? Is Snood subliminal training for “the revolution?” Is it, through ‘hush hush’ technology, the eyes and ears of “Big Brother?” We need to keep probing! We need to keep asking!

Conclusion

So we poked and we probed and we feel a little silly. In talking with other Snood addicts and Dave “The Creator” Dobson himself, it is appallingly clear that Snood is not the problem. We are.

Or rather, it’s our need to waste time. “The more you have to do, the more appealing dumb things are,” said Dobson. It’s true. During exams, when the light at the end of the tunnel is buried under research papers and presentations, most of us don’t begin working right away. We hang out. We watch reruns of The Golden Girls. We play Snood. We do anything to delay – to escape feeling overwhelmed.

Though breakfast may be a heaping bowl of Vivarin with milk for a morning or two, good things can come of procrastination.

Dobson actually created Snood while he was supposed to be writing his dissertation. Now Snood and is internationally appreciated. Dobson says only one percent of Snood players are registered and have paid for the game. Oh but don’t cry for him, Argentina. Millions of people play Snood. One percent of millions, times $14.95, plus money from Snood merchandise probably equals more money than Dobson’s Ph.D. has roped in.

Of course, at the other end of the activity spectrum, Snood-esque vices also keep us from realizing the extent of our own boredom. When asked to speculate about a world without Snood, sophomore Sara Addison said, “I don’t know what I’d do with some of my free time. I’m glad Snood exists; it stops me from being annoyed with solitaire.”

What it comes down to is that we are all trying to escape something.