“Pimps up, hoes down. Put up or shut up. Barbecue or mildew.”
Those are the words of the top-hat-wearing, cane-walking, hoe-getting pimp, junior Travis Boyd, who won the Bryan Quad Dance Best Pimp award for 2003-2004. “This is for the boys back home.”
Last Saturday night, Bryan Quad turned into something like an Academy Awards red carpet, with everyone dressing in their best duds. Many women wore strips of clothing, resembling Christina Aguilera and Jennifer Lopez. They weren’t too shy to show some – or a lot of – skin.
D.J. Lindzey rocked the Quad with trendy hip-hop music from 50 Cent and Ja Rule, to the club classic, “Back that Azz Up.” While music banged, the pimps did their work, getting multiple willing ‘hoes’ to join their ‘hoe circle.’
The question is how pimps get so many hoes. Junior Nick Levy knows a way to a hoe’s heart, saying, “I give flowers.” Ah, the way to a hoe’s heart, gaudy gold chains coupled with some plastic flowers. Hey, they won’t die, right?
With so many pimps competing for so few hoes, there had to be some drama. Though nothing like the Great Drunken Pimp fight of ’95 happened, some did disagree over who was actually the best Pimp.
“This is the biggest bunch of [bologna] in Guilford College history,” said disgruntled pimp Justin Roper. “We by far had the best costume and it was common knowledge [that my friends and I were the best pimps]. The $25 spent on clothes could have been spent at Teeter.”
Fellow pimp James Parker shared his sentiments. “I am wearing a [friggin’] purple hat, purple suit, a Guilford medallion, with black shoes and purple pants. If that ain’t pimp then nothing is.”
Female winner A.J. Robertson was a very gracious pimp. “Pimpin’ ain’t easy,” she said. “I would like to thank all my hoes in the suite and all the people who helped me get ready.”
The clothes weren’t the only thing Academy Awards-esque. There were also the shout-outs.
“I need to thank Jay Evans, Sherod Long, all the boys from English Hall that helped and supported me through all the drama all good pimps go through,” pimp-of-the-night Travis Boyd said. “I also need to thank Senida Kuljuh, my number one.”
Even frustrated pimp Roper congratulated the winners. “Though I lost, I need to give it up to A.J. and Trav Boyd. They are deserving.