There is no doubt that the men’s rugby team plays with some pretty big balls, but few realized just how big their balls were until “Goddamn Voluptuous,” the men’s semi-nude calendar, was released. This calendar, which shows the 2009 team naked except for some strategically placed rugby balls, is groundbreaking for the Guilford community. After a successful season, the men wanted to do something to mark their accomplishments. They received permission for the calendar from Aaron Fetrow, dean of students, and the players began taking off their clothes and firmly grasping their balls. Andrew Slater, junior and captain, explained that the team had been joking about doing a calendar since they saw Duke University’s men’s rugby calendar.

It seems the competition has left the field because Guilford’s calendar contains decidedly more skin and balls, but fewer six-packs than the Duke calendar. Since the men were actually naked, it isn’t surprising that some pictures were deemed too risqué and immediately cut.

According to Slater, one picture of senior Kevin Smithey, almost didn’t make it in because of the placement of a banana over his crotch, and a questionable amount of pubic hair. Luckily Smithey wasn’t left out and all the girls born in June, like myself, can call him their man.

The calendar has elicited many responses, the majority of which have been positive. People seem more than willing to spend $12, which goes towards supporting the club and feeding the players, for a year’s worth of pictures that will never cease to amuse or tease.

First-year Rashon Miller isn’t among that majority. “Guys don’t make calendars. It’s a girl thing,” he said.

For the most part, Miller is right. There are few calendars featuring scantily clad men that aren’t cowboys or firefighters. When January rolls around and it is time to buy a calendar, men have no problem finding semi-nude women to bring a smile to their faces and a tingle to their pants for the coming year. Women don’t have it as easy.

The men of Duke University’s calendar tried to fill that void and seduce through the pages, but they missed the mark and came off as egotistical Abercrombie models. The “Goddamn Voluptuous” men of Guilford aren’t trying to seduce you or show off their rippling muscles-few of them have rippling muscles to display at all.

Junior Paul McCullough admitted as much in his post on the Buzz, “This calendar is the closest thing most of us will ever come to sexy- except of course for Sunshine (Mr. September), who is perpetually godlike.”

While the pictures are nowhere near pornographic, this calendar is not for the faint of heart. There are several players proudly displaying their pubic hair and many debates have arisen over whether it’s a finger or something slightly more private hanging down below a few of those rugby balls. If you think you’ve got the stomach or sense of humor to handle these juicy man morsels, I suggest you fork over the $12. Like most of the people who have already purchased the calendar, I can almost guarantee that you won’t want to wait until January to start enjoying it.

And for those of you in Miller’s shoes, who aren’t into “dudes being naked,” rumor has it that the women’s rugby team might want to join the competition with a calendar of their own.